Lakhi Daniels Portfolio 2020

Neighborhood Studios: Write to the Point 2020

About the Author

Hi, I am a poet who likes to pivot my written work around nature ,and my journey through middlechool as a preteenager struggling to find my own identity.  Writing can be very therapeutic. Being a poet has helped me voice my opinions and speak on topics I don’t feel comfortable speaking out loud. Growing up in the arts, writing and performing pieces has helped me improve my speech and thoughts. Feeling more confident in my voice. Even though my work is often personal I want the people who read my work to often relate. To feel as though we are not alone in whatever struggle or achievement we may face.

My name is Lakhi Daniels. I am 16 and a rising sophomore in high school. I go to Pathways: Academy of Technology and Design. I find interest in the engineering and manufacture profession, as well as writing poetry. I enjoy my company of friends and family.
I am an ambivert, I am very outgoing within a tight group of people I know. 

OUT

Finding a partner isn’t easy, nor is losing them.
But come time and time again,
you will win and lose some.
I was a 6th grader, though it sounds like I was young,
I was only just getting older.
I was making decisions.
Some of those decisions had bad outcomes others,
were great. 
This was a time of change, yes.
 I changed for good.
Lunch.
The smell of pre-packaged pizza 
and chocolate milk.
Collective chattering filled the room.
A sea of dark blue round tables littered the hall.
Sat me. 
With a group of guys.
This was the group I followed.
I guess I felt cool around them.


Yes, they got me in loads of trouble. 
But hey it was all fun and games, right?
We sat at the round table closest to the exit.
Did anything u here the typical teen b

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Make vulgar noises, talk about girls
what have you.
The small guy 
right next to me.
Short brown hair, brown eyes, and small black glasses.
Pipes up.
“Hey who do you like in this school”.
The usual I need to know,  topic.
My mind was lowkey racing trying to find any girl name 
instead blurted a name out.
Someone the same sex as mine.
Someone who I didn’t think could 
love me back.
As soon as those words fell out,
a storm of laughter.
My face is red.

Word spread like wildfire,
always thinking it would stop,
no water was able to put out this embarrassment.
Time flew out of lunch, 
flew out of math,
and out of chorus.
Everything stopped,
but it never truly
STOPPED!

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TEST

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I'm done, I feel tired.
In this class 
I sit at my desk thinking, 
a pencil in my hand and a 
30-page packet
blank and untouched.
 School isn’t what it used to be.
Engaging and hands-on. 
Now 
TEST TEST TEST
Never getting the classes you actually want.
“Sorry You tested below grade level last year”
Or
“Your score said this. I suggest these classes”.
My motivation was lost,
my agitation gained —
Beginning to fail. 
The look of disappointment 
became natural to my mom.
Long nights of crying, yelling, and paper and pencils.
Tear soaked paper,
and 11 pm bedtimes.
It was time for a change.
Switched schools.
Said my goodbyes.
I’ll see them again someday, 
but I needed a school that I could benefit from.

Changing

Funny how much a person can change. 
A bully becomes a best friend.
A best friend 
can become an enemy.
Seeing the change in someone. 
Hearing their minds grow. 
Finding someone again who caused you pain.
Come back to say sorry.
Tells me how much better he’s doing,
asks me if I’m doing all right.
Listens to my achievements. 
It felt like I found a lost friend. 
We were friends at one point.
Feeling bad for how he thought, how he reacted.
I'm happy he came back.
He found me again.
To say hi.
To break my grudge,
my anger.
I am happy.

The Switch

I moved for many reasons. 
Reasons not even my school could recognize. 
Switching schools wasn’t easy.
I'm in a new environment
A scary place for an introvert.
Not sure if I could make friends. 
I'm not sure if I can keep my old friends.
But coming out of a place that didn’t give me what I needed.
Finding a place that let me be me.
To let me explore more than what 
I'm capable of.   

I love you But...

 I love you, 
You are my child.
I love you but… 
You have disrespected me.
Years of caring for you.
Days of teaching you.
But,
I threw it all away. 
Not caring what happens.
Thinking “I love you” can make up for all my.
Fuck ups.
My misbehavior,
my inconsistency,
my lack of responsibility.
I’ve lied 
and lied. 

Not just to you but toward others.
Acting as a STAR child.
Acting as if I don’t make mistakes.
Acting as if I can do the things I don’t here. 
But at other places
I’ve made an impression on no one.
Never thinking.
Never can come up with a better answer than
“I don’t know”.
I stand watching you yell.
Tears roll down as I sob.
But, 
I never yet thought about how many times you’ve cried.
How many times I made you cry enough to turn to anger.
How many times?
I never said, “thank you”. 
But
I realized 
“I love you” is never enough.

Questioning Orientation

My teacher came first.
He asked me the question.
He asked me if he can call her.
He asked the question. 
He ask if it was ok
parent
to 
parent.
He asked the question.
I said yes,
Not thinking
He asked me the question.
Feeling assured everything will go right.