An Abundance of Emotion

by ELLA MACDONALD

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An Abundance of Emotion
Ella MacDonald
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Copyright @ CHS Chapbooks 2021. All rights reserved.
No part of this material may be reproduced or distributed in any form or by any means without permission from CHS Chapbooks.
"There it is, fog, atmospheric moisture still uncertain in destination, not quite weather and not altogether mood, yet partaking of both."

-Hal Borland
1
Happiness   
Happiness, sunshine after a long rainy day,
Warmth on your skin
Basking in the golden glow
Happiness, the smile from someone you love
Teeth exposed
A glow in their eyes
Happiness, feeling proud
Cheeks flushed, eyes wide
Happiness, the smell of spring 
After a cold winter
A new beginning
Happiness, making a new friend
Meeting their eyes
Sharing a joke
Happiness, the comfort of your bed
After a hard day
A long sleep promised
Happiness, christmas trees
With twinkle lights
Snow falling lightly outside the window
Happiness, a person of comfort
A silent reassurance 
That everything will be okay, Happiness.
Sadness
Sadness, a cold rainy day
No end in sight
Sadness, the betrayal of a friend
No longer by your side
Sadness, a lonely feeling
Tears held back 
A lump in your throat 
Sadness, disappointment in yourself
You could’ve done better
Sadness, silence
When all you want to do is talk
Sadness, realizing you’ve changed
You’re growing up, no longer a child
Sadness, heartbreak
Memories fading
Not friends anymore
Sadness, a cold feeling
Outside and 
Inside
Not being able to warm up
Sadness, alone, loss,
Regret
Wondering if anything
Will ever be okay? Sadness.
2
Happiness   
Happiness, sunshine after a long rainy day,
Warmth on your skin
Basking in the golden glow
Happiness, the smile from someone you love
Teeth exposed
A glow in their eyes
Happiness, feeling proud
Cheeks flushed, eyes wide
Happiness, the smell of spring 
After a cold winter
A new beginning
Happiness, making a new friend
Meeting their eyes
Sharing a joke
Happiness, the comfort of your bed
After a hard day
A long sleep promised
Happiness, christmas trees
With twinkle lights
Snow falling lightly outside the window
Happiness, a person of comfort
A silent reassurance 
That everything will be okay, Happiness.
Sadness
Sadness, a cold rainy day
No end in sight
Sadness, the betrayal of a friend
No longer by your side
Sadness, a lonely feeling
Tears held back 
A lump in your throat 
Sadness, disappointment in yourself
You could’ve done better
Sadness, silence
When all you want to do is talk
Sadness, realizing you’ve changed
You’re growing up, no longer a child
Sadness, heartbreak
Memories fading
Not friends anymore
Sadness, a cold feeling
Outside and 
Inside
Not being able to warm up
Sadness, alone, loss,
Regret
Wondering if anything
Will ever be okay? Sadness.
3
The Little Blue Bird
I remember the day I first saw it. It was a Wednesday morning in the spring, early May. I was on the porch, sipping my cup of coffee, looking out at the garden when I spotted it. Sitting on top of a fence post, a small little thing. Its blue wings, fluttering slightly and feathers being ruffled by the morning breeze, it stood proudly, its chest puffed out and its small head high. I studied it for a moment, I became captivated, and every day as I went onto the porch I looked for it, it was always there, on the top of the post. 
Every morning, this bird was there to greet me. I knew it was the same one, because of the little yellow spot on its chest. Everyday, I stepped a little closer. Not wanting to scare it away, I kept quiet. Tip-toeing closer, I would watch. Sometimes it would stand on the post and not move; perhaps watching me. Other times it would chirp or sing its bird song. It would ruffle its feathers and flutter in the air.  
I began to feel a connection to this little blue bird, like it was a friend. It was almost too good to be true, it was unlike anything else I had experienced. I didn’t know what I would do if I never saw it again.
 Why did it come back every day? Was it just me who felt this connection? As time went on, I could stand and watch it on the grass just a few feet away from where it was. Sometimes, I felt the urge to reach out and touch it, just stroke its wings. But I didn’t. I couldn’t ruin what we had. I couldn’t hurt it. Couldn’t let it leave forever. I was so interested in this bird, it had become a morning ritual to go out and greet it. I went out every day, and every day it was there. I never saw any other birds with it, and had no idea where its nest was. Did it have a family? Or was I the only being that it saw every day? I didn’t tell anyone about our encounters. It was something special, something between just me and the bird, something to make me smile every morning.
 As it started to get cold, I still went out every morning, and it was always there. One December morning, the grass was covered in snow. It was crunchy under my slippered feet. There was the little blue bird, perched on the fence post, I was watching it, and it was watching me. We continued this for a few moments when suddenly, it took flight. It flew past me towards my house. I turned just to see it fly right into the front window. With a slight thud, its lifeless body fell and hit the ground, not to get up again. 
4
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