eyeholes in paper bags

by DAMIEN JORDAN

Cover

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chapbook by damien jordan
Copyright © CHS Chapbooks 2021. All rights reserved. No part of this material may be reproduced or distributed in any form or by any means without permission from the author.
All photos from the National Geographic Archives
"I don't know how to function without music. When I'm not making it, I'm listening to it.
It gives me courage and takes care of my mind."
- billie eilish
preface
in may of 2019, i went to a songwriting workshop, and the first thing they asked us was why we wrote songs. they encouraged us to answer, out loud or in our notebooks. just to “get the creative juices flowing”. 
ninth grade me thought it was very lame, and did not care at all. i guess it worked though because here i am writing this chapbook about it.

so what is songwriting to me? why do i do this to myself?
is it because i crave torment via abelton live’s completely incomprehensible interface?
potentially.
or perhaps it’s because i wish to bathe in the material wealth that comes with industry success?
once again, maybe.

but i think it’s an outlet. actually, i know it’s an outlet. like a verbal tear duct or something, where i can wash out all my thoughts into the vacuum of space. 
it’s about feelings, figuring things out, dreams, and memories. 
jump. gravity. escape. return.
In the room.
it's white. when he opens his eyes, and he's standing in the room. 
an emptiness so bright yet so suffocating that it tugs on his lungs as the light drowns the caves of his pupils. 

in the room he thinks. 
the walls don't reach him, and his thoughts can't reach them, so the stalemate hangs him in limbo. is it limbo? he thinks but the answer is too quick to catch.

some things are best left unknown.
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