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A Devotional For The Struggling Soul

by David Scheetz JR.

Pages 4 and 5 of 81

A Devotional For The Struggling Soul
By David Scheetz JR
This book is dedicated to the many suffering souls wandering this earth. For two decades I have faced countless trials and have seen and experienced a lot of pain. Through everything, I continue daily to simply strive for something greater for myself and my family and friends alike. If you are struggling with anything like addiction, mental health issues facing past traumas I hope these writings can help you heal just a bit more. Even if you are just someone who is simply looking for some positive and uplifting material I hope this book helps you. Since I was a child growing up in a toxic environment I've always wanted to help someone simply not feel forgotten or unloved. so I pray these writings help you find your way!
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When we allow ourselves to Walk with God, he can clear our path. Yes, there will be trials up ahead however through faith our king Jesus Christ will be with us as we face the storms. People believe that the biggest misconception is that you can’t Have Jesus and a storm. Remember what God did with his only son, we may face challenges but through our faith will we be rewarded.
Truth is. It's always darkest before the dawn. However as with every night coming to an end so the sun follows. To shine bright on a brand new day.
Last night was really bad for you. You laid there tossing and turning. Maybe you were somewhere sitting alone, the phone was off and you were staring off into the dark with a face full of tears and a shattered heart. Your feeling lost right now. Nothing your doing seems to be workings like even with all your effort. No one sees you.
The bills are stacking, it's like every time you turn around there's a new issue. Car trouble, the animal is sick, cut hours at work, you didn't get that raise you so desperately needed, and now your child is sick as well and well...you don't have insurance because you can barely afford the roof over your head.
Maybe you were thinking, why did he leave me this way? Broken, confused with the weight of the world and our babies...he said forever. Why did she choose him over me? What is it about me that isn't good enough? She said she loved me...No one ever will.
And as the night went on...it got really bad, right? You may have been burying your face in your knees or pillow crying, begging, screaming for your racing thoughts to end. Covered in sweat consumed by fear the inevitable comes across your mind...and now it's time to talk yourself out of suicide....and you did...because...your reading this.
I love you.. I'm glad you made it through another dark and lonely night. Please understand that whatever it is you going through it isn't permanent. And most problems can be solved with something as simple as changed behavior following a changed mindset. You have made it this far, get a reward for your pain by sticking it out. You are worthy and you are loved. There are people out there who need to see you, they need to know you. You matter. Try watching that sunrise tomorrow, it could possibly for just those few mins put you at peace.
Believe me...I know all too well about those few moments. It's why I stay out here...where I'm safe....from me. Until next time....keep up the good fight.
The bills are stacking, it's like every time you turn around there's a new issue. Car trouble, the animal is sick, cut hours at work, you didn't get that raise you so desperately needed, and now your child is sick as well and well...you don't have insurance because you can barely afford the roof over your head.
Maybe you were thinking, why did he leave me this way? Broken, confused with the weight of the world and our babies...he said forever. Why did she choose him over me? What is it about me that isn't good enough? She said she loved me...No one ever will.
And as the night went on...it got really bad, right? You may have been burying your face in your knees or pillow crying, begging, screaming for your racing thoughts to end. Covered in sweat consumed by fear the inevitable comes across your mind...and now it's time to talk yourself out of suicide....and you did...because...your reading this.
I love you.. I'm glad you made it through another dark and lonely night. Please understand that whatever it is you going through it isn't permanent. And most problems can be solved with something as simple as changed behavior following a changed mindset. You have made it this far, get a reward for your pain by sticking it out. You are worthy and you are loved. There are people out there who need to see you, they need to know you. You matter. Try watching that sunrise tomorrow, it could possibly for just those few mins put you at peace.
Believe me...I know all too well about those few moments. It's why I stay out here...where I'm safe....from me. Until next time....keep up the good fight.
6. Exodus 20:17; "Do not covet your neighbor’s house. Do not covet your neighbor’s wife, his male or female slave, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor."
Deuteronomy 28:8
“The Lord will guarantee a blessing on everything you do and will fill your storehouses with grain. The Lord your God will bless you in the land he is giving you.
Never be jealous of what God does for somebody else! Believe me, he has in store something beautiful for you as well, he will never deliver your mail to someone else’s house! As a matter of fact, we should shout out to God in praise for our neighbors because if he blessed them that means he is in the NEIGHBORHOOD! Your time is coming, walk by faith not by sight for walking by sight allows the devil himself to distract you with things of this world. My wife always says to “claim it” so claim your blessings and your gifts because God has them all in-store just for you!
The truth is...I've been walking for a while now missing a lot of pieces of myself. Some were taken from me by people I loved who no longer wanted me...others I lost somewhere along the way in my active addiction. Some I left behind on purpose for someone else I felt needed it more...and some...some just fell out...maybe because I wasn't meant to have it at that time.
Most days I hurt. A lot. I hide it well. I'm damn good at it because well...I choose to be I don't have to be this person who tries so hard to push others to succeed and be happy. I do it though because of the pain I live with I cannot imagine you bearing that same pain.
The missing pieces...what I have left...what I know I need or at least beg for in the middle of the night. Does anyone hear it? Of course not...does anyone know? N,o they do not only because I don't tell. GOD, he hears me...he hears us.
Most days I feel like I'm still losing myself... every day that passes I have to fight harder. I have to fight to get out of bed. I have to fight to face my friends and make sure I'm in a "good mood". I have to fight being alone and how terrible I feel when amongst company. I have to fight to eat even when I would rather starve myself because I'm mortified with my image. I have to fight every minute the suicidal thoughts. Fight to get through the day and then of course. Gear up and prepare for the biggest battle of the day. The nighttime alone In bed with screaming thoughts and flashbacks. The fight to go to sleep. The fight to not just end it all before the next dawn.
Why bother? To put on such a front. Why smile and be positive and love everyone else when all I want to do is not exist anymore...it doesn't make sense?! Does it....why laugh, why try to make other people feel good when I'm shattered inside...what's the point?
Because maybe I believe that if I hold on for just today...that maybe tomorrow will be better. Maybe I believe that...all this positivity and love that I push out will come back to ME. maybe I believe that I won't have to cry myself to sleep. Maybe I believe I won't want to kill myself as soon as I open my eyes tomorrow...
Also more importantly. I do it for you. Because I do not want you to feel the way I do. I do not want you to carry the pain. And if I could I would take it from you and carry it myself. I try so hard to just lift others up. Because I don't want to see you drown. You don't deserve that. I'll fight for you. As empty as I feel with what I'm missing myself. I do not want you to be sad....truth is.. there are many of us like this.
So read this last part and don't forget it...this is for my people who won today because you didn't pull the trigger. I love you so fucking much and I need you to hold on because I don't wanna feel even more alone than I already do because you decided you were too tired to go on...please. we need you here. Don't go...that's not fair... you're loved! I promise you. We can walk through this together I told you I'm over here with a candle...come sit down. Don't pull the trigger today, just read this.....
GOD SAYS
I will stand by you- Ephesians 6:11
I will help you through when you've done all you can do and you can't cope- Isiah 41:13
I will dry your eyes- 21:4
I will fight your fight- Exodus 14:14
I will hold you tight and I won't let go- Deuteronomy 31:6
AGAIN. I love you. Please stay. Don't let go....I promise I won't either...just for today.
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